Nearly 30 years ago, the founder of one of the biggest tech firms ever, the late Steve Jobs, said in an interview that the one simple habit that separates the doers from the dreamers is…
The ability to ask for what you want.
In an interview in 1994, Jobs said:
“Most people never pick up the phone and call. Most people never ask, and that’s what separates the people who do things from the people who just dream about them.”
Being able to ask people for what you want is what made him, and many other people, incredibly wealthy.
A lot of people are too afraid to ask other people for the things they want.
Maybe it is a fear that stops people from asking for what they want. It could be a fear of commitment, a fear of being seen as a nuisance, a fear of rejection and having their request refused.
Whatever it is that stops people from asking, it is stopping people from making a lot or money and leading incredible lives.
Jobs got his big break when at the age of 12; he mustered up the courage to call Bill Hewlett, the co-founder of Hewlett-Packard and said “I want to build a frequency counter, and I was wondering if you have any spare parts I could have”.
Apparently, Hewlett was so impressed with Jobs’ boldness; he gave him the parts and a summer job at HP.
That one phone call changed the course of Jobs life and taught him one of the greatest lessons of his life:
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Be willing to ask for something you want.
Anything and everything that has ever happened in the world came about by those who were bold enough to ask other people for help, for money, for advice, or in Steve Jobs’ case… for parts.
The next big lesson that is life changing and goes hand-in-hand with asking for what you want… is to not take no for an answer.
I don’t mean that you should ignore someone who says no to you and to keep asking them the same question until they relent and say yes as a way to get rid of you.
Some people may say no simply because they are not in a position to give you what you want at that specific time.
It’s not about pestering people to the point of submission; it is about moving on to someone else and asking them for what you want.
Think of authors like JK Rowling.
She wanted her first Harry Potter book publishing and so she asked book publishers if they were interested. Twelve publishers said no, one said yes.
Yes only needs to be said once for it to be life changing!
Had she taken the first no for an answer, she wouldn’t have moved on to the other publishers, and if she had carried on pestering the first publisher she would most certainly have never had the book published.
She asked… and she didn’t take no for an answer.
As the saying goes:
‘If you don’t ask, you will never know.’
It’s better to ask and be told no, than to never have asked at all and have no idea as to what could have been.
It’s even better to ask and be told no and then to move on and ask someone else.
Elon Musk wouldn’t be where he is today if he hadn’t asked for help when starting PayPal all those years ago.
He didn’t do it all himself. He needed help and he needed financing.
Like Jobs, he asked people for what he wanted and needed.
Some people said yes and he got what he wanted and needed.
The rest, as they say, is history.
Kind regards.
John Harrison.
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